The Half Hour - Season 5

Noah Gardenswartz talks about a recent jewelry-based life change, explains why he likes drugs and gambling, and discusses the challenges of being a teacher.

Ramon Rivas II talks about spending time with his nieces and nephews, reveals why he has trouble with women and explains how he managed to survive on a budget in New York.

Joe Machi dissects Tom Brady's faulty logic, points out the one way in which he and Bill Gates are similar and imagines a new alternative to pharmacies.

Drew Michael brainstorms about how he'd like to resolve an argument with his girlfriend and explains how conservatives can be accidentally progressive.

Aparna Nancherla talks about her struggles with depression and anxiety, tells a story about being catcalled and imagines the future of internet listicles.

Nate Fernald describes his terrible week, divulges his various insecurities, shames a rude audience member and does a few impressions.

Ali Siddiq tells a story about his fiercely competitive daughter, faces the hard truth about his son and describes how living in a white neighborhood has changed him.

Cy Amundson reveals the strange ways in which his obsessive-compulsive disorder manifests itself, explains why he loves to lie and describes how to diffuse an argument.

Emily Heller does some spot-on impressions, reveals the most annoying thing about her own brain and explains why she's happy being single.

Erik Bergstrom opens up about his recent battle with cancer, reveals what ruined his last relationship and explains his issue with the Insane Clown Posse.

Martha Kelly shares her opinions on animal rights, talks about her experience with getting sober and reads a letter from her deceased cat.

Nick Turner talks about his rescue dog, defines the term "soul mate" and reveals how he prefers to get the results of STD tests.

Mike Recine dreams about his ultimate comedy goal, explains why his girlfriend isn't suited for her job and reveals how his brother outsmarted the Special Olympics.

Jacqueline Novak talks about the horror of the human body, her love of food, her biggest fear and the least sexual word in the English language.

Naomi Ekperigin explains why she's excited to marry a Jewish man, shares the scariest thing about moving in with her fiance and admits that she doesn't miss being single.

Ahmed Bharoocha shares an embarrassing phobia, talks about his problems with religion and technology, and tells a story about his overly supportive father.

Matthew Broussard admits he looks like a villain, explains why college is basically a social experiment and reveals the least sexy thing you can say to a woman.